Gay men loving men
What Gay and Bi Men Really Want
Are physical and sexual attraction the most appealing qualities in a partner? Or are unseen qualities like good manners and reliability the most attractive?
Following on from his study into what straight women want and what straight men want, D&M Research’s managing director Derek Jones has taken the next reasonable step with his latest study into what gay and bi(sexual) men want.
In order to dig deeper and doodle out a correct list of turn-ons and turn-offs for gay and bi men, Derek once again used of the Im-Ex Polygraph method. He originally devised this method of analysis to distinguish what people say they want from brands, products or services from what they really want by comparing stated versus derived measures of importance.
Qualities the gay and bi men said they desired in a partner (‘stated’) were compared to the qualities present in example celebrities they nominated as attractive (‘implied’). The matching comparison was made between stated and implied negative qualities, to determine what attributes are really the biggest turn-offs.
What Gay Men Should Expect in a Relationship
Some gay men put up with a lot in their relationships. Their long-term partners will aggressively flirt with other men in front of them, go home with a guy from the bar without any forewarning, slumber with ex-lovers without gaining consent from their current lover, or brag to their current boyfriends about the quality of their sex with strangers. Ouch.
Here&#;s what I locate most concerning. Some gay men don&#;t feel they possess a right to be upset about these behaviors. They&#;ll ask me why they feel so jealous and how can I serve them let move of their jealousy. They think that the gay community believes in sexual freedom and it isn&#;t cool or manly to oppose to their partner&#;s sexual behavior.
In other words, they perceive shame for experiencing hurt by the actions of their long-term partners.
Heterosexual couples get plenty of social support for treating their partners with respect when it comes to sex. Outrage is the typical social response when friends are told about poor relationship behavior among straight people. When gay men tell
The Edward Carpenter Community
The Edward Carpenter Community is a network of men who love men, assigned to community-building, creativity, personal growth, friendship and fun. We organise one-week residential retreats – sometimes known as gay men’s weeks – as well as weekend events and one-day workshops at locations around the UK. We also offer additional help and friendship through local groups, heart circles and informal friendship networks.
We celebrate diversity and are open to all men who romance men, whether they identify as gay, bisexual, trans or queer. We are open to men of all ages, ethnic and social backgrounds and abilities, and aim to be as inclusive as possible. To ensure our events are affordable to everyone, our charges are on a sliding scale according to income. We are a not-for-profit organisation run by volunteers.
Edward Carpenter events and membership of our community can be life-changing and transformative. Every person’s experience is unique and personal, and the best way to find out what the community can do for you is to join one of our e
An Introduction
My client sat in the chair looking down at the floor, glancing up briefly to make eye contact, then darting his eyes back to the carpet. He spoke quietly, as if almost frightened to be heard. He clutched his hands throughout the session, displaying all the markers of an anxious noun in the throes of shame. He was a modern client to my practice: a married, middle-aged, suburban dad with a high-powered career. A colleague had given him my number months before. It took him a adj time to muster the courage to call and produce an appointment. Towards the end of our first session he looked up at me and said, “I verb I’m in love…with another man. I’m scared and I don’t know what to do.”
I own worked with hundreds of gay men in heterosexual marriages struggling with being in the closet or wanting to emerge from it. There is so much about these men that is misunderstood and very few studies or little literature to provide insight. I decided to contribute my thoughts and research about these men and their struggles at a conference a rare years ago. That presentation led to other oppor